Sunday, April 30, 2006


i've just completed my revision for chemistry. yay. ^^

i was listening to many many songs while doing up my notes for chemistry and those songs really bring back many memories.
well, i guess its good to rake up the old memories once in a while.
the most unforgettable memory, surprisingly, is the time i spent with aky, and not the time i spent with joewell.
he was a great turning point in my life.
he changed me and made me realise certain things.
however, we have not contacted each other for two years already.
the song, five colours in her hair from mcfly was our favourite song back then.
i was devastated at the breakup of me and my first stead and i couldnt stop crying.
it was as if the whole world was crashing down on me.
i was at the very bottom of a pit, and i thought i couldnt climb out again.
it was him. him who pulled me out of the pit and showed me light.
it was he who brought happiness and colours into my life.
it was he, he whom i'll remember for the rest of my life.
when i was still crying because i missed my first stead,
he composed a song with me using our favourite song, which was five colours in her hair, and made me laugh.
we were criticising my first stead and it was fun.
we had quite alot of happy moments together and he really cared for me.
but i was the one who brought our happy moments to a standstill.
the ignorant me didnt realise how much he had given in to me and the care and concern he showed.
i quarrelled with him and since then, we havent talked nor contacted each other.
if i could go back time, i'll will definitely make amendments and save this friendship.
but now, it is all too late.

well, the next song which raked up another memory is hui you na me yi tian from lin jun jie.
this was joewell and my favourite song when we were together.
i remembered every night when we talked on the phone,
we would sing this song together.
we could sing for very long and not stop.
how loving we were back then.
the foolish me neglected my studies and friends just because of him.
i was having troubles with jasmine, yt and gwen and yt was worried about my studies because all i ever thought of was joewell, joewell and only joewell.
yes, love is blind.
that was why i was so blind so have forsaken those important people around me because of him.
but he really made me feel as though i was the most fortunate girl on earth.
he showered me with lots of love and care.
but everything that has a start, has an end.
we ended because of one "i do not have feelings for you anymore."
this sentence meant so much to me.
i couldnt stop crying.
the guy i loved the most ditched me with just one sentence.
that very sentence changed everything.
since then, i didnt dare to devote myself into a relationship.
all my relationships lasted for less than a month.
guess it really had a big impact on me.

shall mention the last song because if i keep continuing, it would be non-stop and i doubt blogger even have the space for me.
the song, breathe easy from blue, reminded me of the worst times i've been through during secondary one.
i cried to sleep while listening to this song.
i was accused of something i didnt do and was made the scapegoat unknowningly.
but its over now.
and i dont really feel like talking about it.


okay, time to start on my physics.
tata! and study hard peeps.

2:41 PM
Cartoon KAT-TUN II You <3